From Muddled to Motivated

How to Figure Out What You Want and Go After It

Blame it on the recent full moon, the election cycle, karmic shifts, or just the time of year — people, myself included, have been a bit unclear about what they truly want. “Muddled” seems to be the best word to describe this collective mindset. I used to think that with age, clarity would come easier. Yet here I am, wrestling with it again. Time has a funny way of narrowing down the boundless possibilities we imagined in our youth.

Nonetheless, there’s still an abundance of options. Unfortunately, many people stumble through their days by accident rather than on purpose. If you know what you want, you have a purpose. Yet many move at a lugubrious pace, convinced by whatever excuse feels most valid.

Isn’t purpose supposed to infuse you with boundless energy? Yes. When you’re purposefully pursuing what you genuinely want, there’s little room for navel-gazing. When you’re truly aligned, there’s no time for indecision or endless overthinking. You’re too busy moving forward.

That’s your red flag — when something feels off, it usually means you’re not acting in alignment with your values. Even if you’re constantly on the go, frantic with activity, yet still feeling directionless, it’s a clue you’re working on the wrong thing.

You need three elements for exceptional performance:

Vision + Passion + Action

• Vision is what you imagine — that mental picture of success. Worriers see failure. High achievers see only success.

• Passion is the fuel that drives you. It’s the burning desire to complete your mission — the thing that gets you up in the morning and keeps you up at night.

• Action is where the rubber meets the road. It’s the daily grind that nourishes your vision and passion, turning ideas into reality.

• The daydreamers have passion and vision but lack action.

• The workaholics have action and passion but lack vision, leading them to accomplish a lot of meaningless tasks.

• The mediocre have vision and action but no passion, so they never break through to excellence.

You need all three to achieve extraordinary results.

But How Do You Figure Out What You Want?

If inspiration hasn’t swooped in to save the day, you’ll have to put in the work. It’s a process of introspection and honest self-assessment. Here’s an approach to use whenever you feel stuck or directionless. Give it a try.

1. Create Space for Reflection
Find a quiet corner where you can be alone with your thoughts — a cozy nook at home, a quiet spot in a park, or a tucked-away café. Schedule regular reflection time, whether daily, weekly, or even monthly. This is your time to check in with yourself.

2. Ask Yourself Powerful Questions
What truly matters to me?
What am I naturally drawn to, even if it seems impractical?
If time, money, or the opinions of others weren’t factors, what would I pursue?
What activities make me lose track of time?
What do I want to be remembered for?

3. Write It Down
Journal your thoughts. No censoring—let it all spill out, even if it’s messy. The act of writing brings clarity. List your desires, big and small. Seeing them on paper helps you organize and prioritize.

4. Identify Your Values
Your core values guide your decisions. What principles do you hold dear? Integrity, creativity, freedom, security, connection? Rank them. Knowing your values helps align your goals with what truly matters.

5. Visualize Your Ideal Life
Close your eyes and picture your perfect day. Where are you? What are you doing? Who are you with? How do you feel? Capture this vision in a journal, vision board, or mind map. Don’t dismiss this exercise; it’s more powerful than you might think.

6. Assess What You Don’t Want
Sometimes, clarity comes from knowing what you refuse to tolerate. Make a list of what drains you — toxic relationships, a soul-sucking job, habits that no longer serve you. This will help you draw boundaries and refocus on what aligns with your goals.

7. Set Clear, Specific Goals
Use the SMMART+ framework to define your goals. Make them Specific, Motivating, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, Time-bound, and Positively worded. Don’t just aim to “be happy.” Instead, say, “I want to feel more joyful by spending at least two hours a week on activities I love.” Break your goals down into actionable steps.

8. Listen to Your Intuition
Your gut feeling is a powerful compass. When you consider a particular option, pay attention to your body’s response. Excitement, calmness, and relief are signs that you’re on the right track.

9. Take Action and Experiment
Clarity often comes from doing. Take small steps toward what you think you want. Experiment, learn, adjust. It’s okay if what you thought you wanted changes over time. Now, you’re better equipped to refine your goals.

10. Reflect and Reassess Regularly
Check in with yourself often. Are you still on the right path? Are your desires evolving? Adjust as needed. Life isn’t static, and neither are your goals.

By following these steps, you’ll better understand what you truly want. That clarity empowers you to make decisions aligned with your values, passions, and purpose. When you act with intention, you shift from accidental to purposeful living.